1. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
2. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
3. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
4. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
5. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
6. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
7. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
8. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
9. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
10. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
11. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
12. Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.